Next stop the UN headquarters

I spent yesterday in a rather unusual fashion, or at least I'm not the kind of person who usually spends her Saturday taking a day long class just for the fun of it. But yesterday I did, and I really enjoyed it. I recently joined the Swedish UN association, and although I haven't been active so far, I thought that I should do something about it. Yesterday they held a class where they went through the history of the UN, how it works, its structure and where they work. The situation in Darfur was also brought up, as well as some other examples of where the UN has worked.

The more I learn about different things, the more confused I get as to what I actually want to do with my life. You'd think that at 26, I really should have figured this out, but clearly I haven't. After yesterday, I want to work at the UN, but I also want to be a diplomat and apply to the MFA's diplomat program later this year. If I did that, though, that would mean that I had to stay in Stockholm for several years, and I'm not sure that I actually want to stay here.

I've promised myself that I will stay in Stockholm until the end of the summer. I'm sure things will improve once the weather starts getting better, when days get longer and every day is no longer filled with an eternal greyness. But if they don't, I'm off to London again. Until then, I'll keep applying for jobs in New York, because if New York wants me, then New York cannot wait.

I just finished watching the Sex and the City movie, and I'm floating around on cloud 9, totally high on NYC and fabulous dresses. When will that life ever be mine? It's no a question of if, but merely a question of when. It's going to happen. I'm not destined for the dullness that is everyday life, it's driving me insane!

I hate Sunday nights.. I hate knowing that at 7 am tomorrow morning my alarm will go off and I will have to drag myself to my boring, unfulfulling job, spend 8 hours there, then drag myself to the gym for an hour, only to come home to a paper that has to be written for my political science class.

All I want is to have a job that I love, in a city that I love. And an apartment that I love, with someone that I love. Is that really so much to ask?