Missing you Marina

I just got a call from one of my best friends, a girl who now lives in Slovenia, and who I used to share a life with back in the day. We studied together in Bournemouth, became friends only at the beginning of the second semester and have been inseperable ever since. Well, that is since we both moved back to our respective countries. Before that we did everything together. We would make dinner for each other, we'd spend countless nights in her kitchen drinking beer and eating doritos and analyzing each other's lives. We'd go to O'Neill's, our favorite hang-out in Bournemouth more often than was perhaps wise, and bump into all kinds of freaks and geeks.

When we'd finished uni, we moved to London together, shared an amazing house with some other amazing Bournemouth people, but somehow it was as though living together did the opposite of bringing us closer together. We both worked a lot, and we never had the energy, time or money to just go out and have fun together. I regret that now. Our time in London together was supposed to be amazing, yet all I remember from that time is hating my job.

I still consider her to be one of my best friends, though, and when I think about it I can't believe that we are so far apart, that we will never live in the same city again. That we used to be so close, she was the one I would confide in, always. I want those days back. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Studying abroad is both one of the best and one of the worst things you can ever do. It's the most amazing experience, and you meet some of the most amazing people in the world, but then you have to leave it all and go back to the dull reality that is real life.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm not so sure that this whole real life thing is for me. I much preferred the fantasy life I lived during my study abroad experiences, when everything seemed possible and I was still young. Although I still have the same dreams, I feel like I'm getting too old to achieve them, like life is slipping away, and all the people I used to know with it, and all I can do is sit at my frikkin embassy with my joke of a job and watch it happen.

And I don't like it. I don't like it at all.